HeLL oF ThE NoRtH

WHAT TIME IS IT, GAME TIME, WHAT TIME IS IT, GAME TIME!!!!!


O ya... Tomorrow all you Shittake talking mofos will experience what I call the beautiful suffering.

Tomorrow you will experience Cold and WET... I tried to tell you, cold, OK, wet OK, cold + wet, extreme suffering...

I tried to tell you guys a couple of days ago you weren't ready, but Now I will really tell you, YOU AIN'T READY.

So, I tell you what, unless you love pain, you should probably stay home if you wake up tomorrow and its raining.

For real. I love my fellow Floridian cyclist. Even your kids are telling you to do the right thing!!

But I have learned after putting on some fun, but challenging events, you guys are a fair weather bunch. You want perfect weather, groomed trails, fully supported sag stops, back rubs, manned bicycle clean up spots, t shirts, and beer sags. And I don't fault you.. Why else would you live in Florida, the sunshine state, by definition this place is about fair weather.

So my expectation is that 75% of you wont know what to do yourself tomorrow when Ice is falling from the sky and the windchill factor puts temps into the high teens.

Myself, being an expert of challenging myself(which is what real athletes and adventurers do) well guide you.

Here is the budget way to help yourself not suffer so bad.Start off with a can of this you big pussy!

1. buy some dish washing gloves.
2. get some rain gear or go to wal mart and buy some rain gear.
3. get some plastic bags.
4. get some wool socks.
5. layer up but don't over do it, remember your gonna be moving.
6. get a wool shirt.
7. get a hat or a hood or something to wear under your head.

So under your gloves or as your gloves wear the dish washing gloves.
Dress down and put your cheap rain suit over your gear.
before putting on your sock, put them plastic bags on your feet.
Put on them wool socks now.
Recommended layers. Base, wool, layer two lycra, layer three wool, layer four if needed a cycling shirt to represent your sponsor or favorite brand. Arm warmers, then on top of that your rain jacket.
Bring a bag to stuff layers in.
Get a cycling cap or a woolly cap and put that under your helmet.
Now your ready, at least better prepared.

Stay moving and don't pit stop longer then 3 minutes, learn to eat while your rolling. You wanna survive don't you...

Wear some clear glasses, theirs gonna be mud, Ice and blood and guts.

Good luck...

See ya there!!!

HTFU dot com.

Laters,

Dont listen to me, listen to the great creator, Amen

The NaKeD InDiaN